So I went to pick Vanea up from the airport tonight, which is no big deal because I love the airport. I get there, it's kind of crowded, and it takes me about 5 minutes to get to the pickup spot instead of just driving up to the place where she is. Anyway, she had texted me right as I was getting to the place where she said she would be and told me that she was going to the bathroom. I panic a little because there are airport security guards every 10 feet or so and I know they're not going to let me park my car. I pull up to an empty spot behind a Buick and I pray for her to hurry because there's one of those guards standing next to the car in front of me. He leaves and points at me to move my car. I'm ready with my excuse that I'm waiting for my pregnant friend, but he starts walking down the row of cars, so I figure he didn't care that much and maybe I didn't need to move my car. He comes back, Vanea's still not there, I'm starting to panic more, but am also kind of mad that the guy didn't even take the time to listen to my excuse, which was a REALLY good one. He says, "I told you to move your car a couple of minutes ago, why haven't you done that?" I tell him, "My pregnant friend had to use the restroom and she's going to be right back." To which he says, "Well, if I had a pregnant friend, I would park my car in the structure and help her with her bags." Then I looked over and Vanea was standing right next to my car in her cute maternity outfit and puts her bags that a 5 year old could probably carry without a problem into my trunk. It was AMAZING timing and the guy didn't say anything else to me.
p.s. I don't really understand why a guy would make his pregnant friend walk all the way to the parking structure, even if he was carrying her bags for her. It seems like more of a burden for the woman to walk that far than to carry a few bags about 50 yards from the baggage claim.
p.s.s. I still love the airport.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
The bunny
Today I went walking on the boardwalk in Newport. This isn't anything out of the ordinary because I do this at least twice a week. While I was walking past the big clock, I saw a man playing guitar and he had something on top of his hat. I couldn't figure out what it was at first, but there was a fairly large crowd around him and I knew it would be something interesting. As I got closer, I saw that it was a bunny on his head. As I continued to get closer, I saw that he had a chicken, another bunny, and a guinea pig that were around a little table in front of him. So strange, but I kept walking because I knew I could pay closer attention when I was walking back.
Once I came back, he had added a dog to the mix and it was sitting on a leash next to him... it kind of looked like one of the dogs from "Pirates of the Caribbean." By this time there were 2 cops who didn't seem to know what to do. It's like they didn't want to interrupt this train wreck that was occurring in front of them because it was pretty entertaining, but they also seemed like they were trying to figure out a way to cite him for something. I stopped briefly to hear what his singing voice sounded like, but it was a little too twangy and I decided to continue on my way.
Once I came back, he had added a dog to the mix and it was sitting on a leash next to him... it kind of looked like one of the dogs from "Pirates of the Caribbean." By this time there were 2 cops who didn't seem to know what to do. It's like they didn't want to interrupt this train wreck that was occurring in front of them because it was pretty entertaining, but they also seemed like they were trying to figure out a way to cite him for something. I stopped briefly to hear what his singing voice sounded like, but it was a little too twangy and I decided to continue on my way.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Freedom
We talked a lot at Tuesday night's bible study, so this is kind of a continuation of the last blog. Hilary brought up the amazing question of, "What does freedom in Christ look like in a person's life?" Carrie's response was that we experience freedom when we're truly living in the moment, being aware of God's presence, and not dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. That statement was absolutely true, so I wanted to try and remember the times that has happened to me...
~ The majority of the week at RFKC was like that this year. I was almost always completely in the moment. Not thinking about what was going on at home, not thinking about what I'm going to do for a job or missions. Just spending time with the girls in cabin 17 and enjoying their company. There was Shaneia and her AMAZING sense of rhythm/hip hop skills. Kristin, Justine, and I were a great team as counselors because we were able to back each other up when it came to following through on any rules for the girls and we had so much fun as a group. Jennifer would take my arm whenever we were walking anywhere and it was so cute because I didn't think of her as a particularly clingy child when I first met her. Jennifer being cuddled up next to me during the graduation ceremony and I just kept crying because I was thinking, "This is what life is about. God has placed us in each other's lives this week for a reason, she has stolen my heart, and I'm going to miss her so much when this week is over." Crying pretty much every morning when people would talk about the breakthroughs that happen with some of the campers each year. Getting to be at the same table as "Quickfeet Blake" for all of the meals. He charmed the socks off of me from the very beginning. After our first lunch, he said, "I don't usually do this when I first meet a person, but...," then he went to give me a hug and I just about died from trying to stifle my laughter.
~ Going to Blaine, Kentucky and not wanting to leave because of the people that I met on that trip. We had so much fun, even though there were 11 of us in a 2 bedroom apartment and the bathroom door didn't close all the way unless you stuck a shoe underneath it. My favorite memory was watching the kids start a bible study during their free time. They just had a craving to read more of the bible and they did that when they could have been playing cards or hiking or playing music.
~ Any time spent with my family, whether it's going to the Wards' to watch "Psych" and play "Rock Band" or going out to lunch with the 'rents and the Fazakerleys.
~ Sitting in the backyard while reading a book, writing in my journal, or playing Sudoku.
~ Having the perfect summer day, which includes going to the beach with friends, playing in the waves, getting frozen yogurt, and having a barbecue.
~ When my students knew the routine and followed it without needing to be reminded of what to do next.
~ Joking around with coworkers at the Beach Pit while eating ice cream and blueberry cornbread.
~ Taking long walks while talking with friends.
~ Holding Alethea while she's asleep and seeing how peaceful a baby can be. Seeing her smile and having fun when she's awake.
The common thread among the majority of these things is that they are about having relationships with people and being aware of God's presence. I need to be better at living my life that way!
~ The majority of the week at RFKC was like that this year. I was almost always completely in the moment. Not thinking about what was going on at home, not thinking about what I'm going to do for a job or missions. Just spending time with the girls in cabin 17 and enjoying their company. There was Shaneia and her AMAZING sense of rhythm/hip hop skills. Kristin, Justine, and I were a great team as counselors because we were able to back each other up when it came to following through on any rules for the girls and we had so much fun as a group. Jennifer would take my arm whenever we were walking anywhere and it was so cute because I didn't think of her as a particularly clingy child when I first met her. Jennifer being cuddled up next to me during the graduation ceremony and I just kept crying because I was thinking, "This is what life is about. God has placed us in each other's lives this week for a reason, she has stolen my heart, and I'm going to miss her so much when this week is over." Crying pretty much every morning when people would talk about the breakthroughs that happen with some of the campers each year. Getting to be at the same table as "Quickfeet Blake" for all of the meals. He charmed the socks off of me from the very beginning. After our first lunch, he said, "I don't usually do this when I first meet a person, but...," then he went to give me a hug and I just about died from trying to stifle my laughter.
~ Going to Blaine, Kentucky and not wanting to leave because of the people that I met on that trip. We had so much fun, even though there were 11 of us in a 2 bedroom apartment and the bathroom door didn't close all the way unless you stuck a shoe underneath it. My favorite memory was watching the kids start a bible study during their free time. They just had a craving to read more of the bible and they did that when they could have been playing cards or hiking or playing music.
~ Any time spent with my family, whether it's going to the Wards' to watch "Psych" and play "Rock Band" or going out to lunch with the 'rents and the Fazakerleys.
~ Sitting in the backyard while reading a book, writing in my journal, or playing Sudoku.
~ Having the perfect summer day, which includes going to the beach with friends, playing in the waves, getting frozen yogurt, and having a barbecue.
~ When my students knew the routine and followed it without needing to be reminded of what to do next.
~ Joking around with coworkers at the Beach Pit while eating ice cream and blueberry cornbread.
~ Taking long walks while talking with friends.
~ Holding Alethea while she's asleep and seeing how peaceful a baby can be. Seeing her smile and having fun when she's awake.
The common thread among the majority of these things is that they are about having relationships with people and being aware of God's presence. I need to be better at living my life that way!
Rules vs. Grace
We were talking about having freedom in Christ last night during bible study because of going through Galatians. I have loved studying this book because Paul talks so much about experiencing God's grace and he emphasizes that it is not about obeying the law. In Galatians 3:11, it says, "So it is clear that no one can be made right with God by trying to keep the law. For the Scriptures say, 'It is through faith that a righteous person has life.' "
I have spent the majority of my time as a Christian being concerned with obeying the rules, trying to be kind to others, going to church, etc., and treating my relationship with Jesus like a checklist. God loves me no matter what I do for Him because I'm His child. On the other hand, there are things that I want to do to show Him how much I love Him and I think that's why the legalism occurs. It ends up that I do things because I think He'll appreciate it, but those things don't matter if my heart isn't in it... and the bottom line is that it all comes down to the heart. There's a song by Ginny Owens called, "I Am Nothing," where she sings about how she could cross the oceans to tell people about Jesus, teach Sunday School, give away all of her money, etc., "but if I do not love, I am nothing." If I'm doing anything and saying that it's for Jesus while not really thinking about Him, then it's wrong. It means that I'm trying to gain His approval and I'm being completely legalistic.
I don't need to do anything to be loved by God. I should WANT to do things because of having a relationship with Him, but He loves me unconditionally- no matter what my attitude is. If I'm reading my bible, it needs to be because I want to learn more about the Lord and grow deeper in my relationship with Him. It shouldn't be because I have devotions and I need to get them done at some point during the day to make me a better Christian. If I'm going to church, it needs to be because I want to worship Jesus. Not because it's 5:30 on Saturday night and that's where I always am during that day and time. I don't think He wants people doing things for Him just because they're part of a routine.
I'm still grappling with all of this and haven't come up with a clear answer. I know that all of my actions do need to be done with love, but I'm also aware of the fact that there are times when I need to be responsible and do things that I don't feel like doing. There are going to be times when my heart isn't in something that I'm doing for God, but I'll still need to follow through with them. It's so hard to find the line where something is being done out of obligation and fear instead of out of joy and love. God's grace is the only thing that can allow me to experience that joy and love, though.
I'll end with this analogy... I love babies and have been around when a lot of them were newborns. The fascinating thing about them is how much people adore them, even though they're not able to DO anything for another person. They cry, they eat, they smile, they poop, they laugh, etc., but they're not going to do the dishes, join you over a cup of coffee, or give you advice on a major decision. They bring so much joy to the people who love them, though, just because of who they are and because of spending time with them. I think that's the way God looks at us as His children. I don't need to do anything to make Him love me. I just need to be aware of His presence and while I'm doing that, He's probably up there saying, "Look at Jenna, she's working hard to show how much she loves me, but she doesn't need to because I'm just so happy that she's one of my children."
I have spent the majority of my time as a Christian being concerned with obeying the rules, trying to be kind to others, going to church, etc., and treating my relationship with Jesus like a checklist. God loves me no matter what I do for Him because I'm His child. On the other hand, there are things that I want to do to show Him how much I love Him and I think that's why the legalism occurs. It ends up that I do things because I think He'll appreciate it, but those things don't matter if my heart isn't in it... and the bottom line is that it all comes down to the heart. There's a song by Ginny Owens called, "I Am Nothing," where she sings about how she could cross the oceans to tell people about Jesus, teach Sunday School, give away all of her money, etc., "but if I do not love, I am nothing." If I'm doing anything and saying that it's for Jesus while not really thinking about Him, then it's wrong. It means that I'm trying to gain His approval and I'm being completely legalistic.
I don't need to do anything to be loved by God. I should WANT to do things because of having a relationship with Him, but He loves me unconditionally- no matter what my attitude is. If I'm reading my bible, it needs to be because I want to learn more about the Lord and grow deeper in my relationship with Him. It shouldn't be because I have devotions and I need to get them done at some point during the day to make me a better Christian. If I'm going to church, it needs to be because I want to worship Jesus. Not because it's 5:30 on Saturday night and that's where I always am during that day and time. I don't think He wants people doing things for Him just because they're part of a routine.
I'm still grappling with all of this and haven't come up with a clear answer. I know that all of my actions do need to be done with love, but I'm also aware of the fact that there are times when I need to be responsible and do things that I don't feel like doing. There are going to be times when my heart isn't in something that I'm doing for God, but I'll still need to follow through with them. It's so hard to find the line where something is being done out of obligation and fear instead of out of joy and love. God's grace is the only thing that can allow me to experience that joy and love, though.
I'll end with this analogy... I love babies and have been around when a lot of them were newborns. The fascinating thing about them is how much people adore them, even though they're not able to DO anything for another person. They cry, they eat, they smile, they poop, they laugh, etc., but they're not going to do the dishes, join you over a cup of coffee, or give you advice on a major decision. They bring so much joy to the people who love them, though, just because of who they are and because of spending time with them. I think that's the way God looks at us as His children. I don't need to do anything to make Him love me. I just need to be aware of His presence and while I'm doing that, He's probably up there saying, "Look at Jenna, she's working hard to show how much she loves me, but she doesn't need to because I'm just so happy that she's one of my children."
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
You can't always get what you want.
Something that I'm finally figuring out as I'm getting older is that I don't know anyone who has it all and I don't know anyone who has nothing. By all, I mean joy, faith, money, marriage, true love, children, career, education, free time, house, car, etc.. There are people who have some of these things (a few may even have most of them), but I don't know anyone who has all or nothing. What I'm also starting to realize is that the things that a person wants more than anything else in the world are usually the things that will be the most difficult for them to attain. The things that don't matter much to them will often come easily and without much thought.
This has also happened with a few of the jobs that I've had. When I first got out of college, it was really difficult for me to find a job that I felt at peace with and I remember searching for 8 months to find a place that fit what I was looking for. It ended up that I started working with adults with developmental disabilities and found that I loved it. Finding that first job was incredibly hard, but everything after that has fallen into place because I found my niche in teaching people with disabilities. I haven't had many worries about my career path since that period of time when I was 22 years old because of knowing what I need to do as a career.
I look at friends who are dealing with infertility and it's so devastating for them because all they want during this life is to have a baby of their own to love. There are others out there who didn't care much about whether they had a child and ended up pregnant as soon as they decided to try. I look at the kids at Royal Family Kids' Camp and think about how so many of their parents didn't want to have kids and didn't want to take responsibility for them. Those kids were born into abusive, neglectful families, yet it was so easy for their moms to get pregnant with them.
I have spent the majority of my life wanting to fall in love and get married more than anything. It's something that has even been an idol at some points because I wanted to know what it was like SO badly. I keep trying to surrender it, but then a nice guy comes along and I think, "this might be it and it's finally going to be easy." It never is, though, and there's always some curveball that gets thrown in there to prevent anything from happening. It has become very discouraging and I don't think it would be that way if I just didn't care about it. Instead, I usually end up thinking that God is laughing at me when it comes to this area of my life. I know He's not, I know that I need to trust Him, and I know that it truly will be easy when the right man comes into my life. He really is protecting me, but I still tend to get upset about it because it just keeps happening over and over in different, random ways.
I guess my thoughts on all of this are that God truly does give people the desires of their hearts because He is the one who plants them in there. I think our deepest desires are usually the ones that are the most difficult to attain because God wants us to appreciate them more once He eventually does give them to us. I just need to keep my focus on God by depending on Him alone and not having my thoughts dwell as much on the things in my life that I want to happen.
I guess my thoughts on all of this are that God truly does give people the desires of their hearts because He is the one who plants them in there. I think our deepest desires are usually the ones that are the most difficult to attain because God wants us to appreciate them more once He eventually does give them to us. I just need to keep my focus on God by depending on Him alone and not having my thoughts dwell as much on the things in my life that I want to happen.
Monday, August 25, 2008
Humbled
As I've gotten older, I've realized that there are all sorts of different ways that people handle life. Some of them are what I like to call "paper people," and then there are the rest (I don't have a name for them, but maybe I'll think of one by the time I finish writing this). I want to talk about the paper people because I'm beginning to think that I became one of those for awhile. They are the ones whose lives look great to outsiders... they have the degrees, the career, the house, etc., that make people think that this is a great person. It doesn't, though, because the thing that is missing from all of that is depth and love. This is not to say that everyone who has those things is shallow and/or hateful, it's just to say that there's more to life than what we have accomplished in the eyes of other people.
I have my master's degree, I spent the past 3 years as a special ed. teacher, I volunteered for 4 years with a boy who lives in a group home, and I live in a beautiful house with 4 other girls who are amazing individuals. All of these things sound great to other people and look good on paper, but I let them define who I am when they really didn't matter. I spent a good portion of the past year being unhappy because I was trying to live up to a set of expectations that no one cared about and I didn't want to quit anything because I was afraid of failing others. It ended up that I was spending so much time doing things for others and I wasn't taking the time to love them or get to know them. I was so caught up in trying to do the right thing (while burning out) and I failed at the thing which is the most important (loving others).
Right now I'm working at the Beach Pit BBQ and I love it! My coworkers are great and I'm always surprised at how kind they are to everyone. I've heard about 3 negative comments from any of them about anyone else during the 6 weeks or so that I've worked there. They're people that I probably never would have gotten to know otherwise, but I'm so thankful for it because it has shown me that a person's accomplishments have nothing to do with how they treat others. That's what is more important than anything and I'm learning it by seeing the actions of people who are still in high school and college.
When I'm there, there's a part of me that's thinking about how I used to be a teacher. It's a profession that people usually think pretty highly of because of making a difference in the life of a child. When I think that, I realize that I was defining how valuable I am as a person by my career choice. The other part of me is thinking about how I'm having fun doing this, even though it's not a job that's going to change anyone's life (although the blueberry cornbread is pretty amazing and can bring a lot of joy to others). Then I look at the people around me and realize that I'm learning from them. I'm learning to treat others equally, to realize that what they've accomplished doesn't matter, and to find out what they're like as individuals.
It's funny because we're going through the book of Galatians in bible study right now and a lot of Paul's writing has to do with God's grace and the fact that we can't earn our salvation. Galatians 3:5 says, "I ask you again, does God give you the Holy Spirit and work miracles among you because you obey the law? Of course not! It is because you believe the message you heard about Christ." That's what I've been doing my entire life... trying so hard to do the right thing, follow the rules, etc., that I'm taking everything into my own hands and not putting my faith in Jesus. I don't have to accomplish anything in my life for Him to love me because I have His grace. I'm finally experiencing His grace by letting go of the things I held onto for so long that were causing me to burn out and by taking on a job that is causing me to learn more about Him and love for other people.
This summer has been one of the happiest times in my life because of learning these things, getting to spend quality time with friends and family, finally being content with being single, and being excited over this new adventure that is most likely going to take place in Kentucky :). I've finally realized that I'm one lucky girl who is loved unconditionally by God.
I have my master's degree, I spent the past 3 years as a special ed. teacher, I volunteered for 4 years with a boy who lives in a group home, and I live in a beautiful house with 4 other girls who are amazing individuals. All of these things sound great to other people and look good on paper, but I let them define who I am when they really didn't matter. I spent a good portion of the past year being unhappy because I was trying to live up to a set of expectations that no one cared about and I didn't want to quit anything because I was afraid of failing others. It ended up that I was spending so much time doing things for others and I wasn't taking the time to love them or get to know them. I was so caught up in trying to do the right thing (while burning out) and I failed at the thing which is the most important (loving others).
Right now I'm working at the Beach Pit BBQ and I love it! My coworkers are great and I'm always surprised at how kind they are to everyone. I've heard about 3 negative comments from any of them about anyone else during the 6 weeks or so that I've worked there. They're people that I probably never would have gotten to know otherwise, but I'm so thankful for it because it has shown me that a person's accomplishments have nothing to do with how they treat others. That's what is more important than anything and I'm learning it by seeing the actions of people who are still in high school and college.
When I'm there, there's a part of me that's thinking about how I used to be a teacher. It's a profession that people usually think pretty highly of because of making a difference in the life of a child. When I think that, I realize that I was defining how valuable I am as a person by my career choice. The other part of me is thinking about how I'm having fun doing this, even though it's not a job that's going to change anyone's life (although the blueberry cornbread is pretty amazing and can bring a lot of joy to others). Then I look at the people around me and realize that I'm learning from them. I'm learning to treat others equally, to realize that what they've accomplished doesn't matter, and to find out what they're like as individuals.
It's funny because we're going through the book of Galatians in bible study right now and a lot of Paul's writing has to do with God's grace and the fact that we can't earn our salvation. Galatians 3:5 says, "I ask you again, does God give you the Holy Spirit and work miracles among you because you obey the law? Of course not! It is because you believe the message you heard about Christ." That's what I've been doing my entire life... trying so hard to do the right thing, follow the rules, etc., that I'm taking everything into my own hands and not putting my faith in Jesus. I don't have to accomplish anything in my life for Him to love me because I have His grace. I'm finally experiencing His grace by letting go of the things I held onto for so long that were causing me to burn out and by taking on a job that is causing me to learn more about Him and love for other people.
This summer has been one of the happiest times in my life because of learning these things, getting to spend quality time with friends and family, finally being content with being single, and being excited over this new adventure that is most likely going to take place in Kentucky :). I've finally realized that I'm one lucky girl who is loved unconditionally by God.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
The Plan
I decided to quit teaching this year because a) I was completely overwhelmed and b) I was feeling led to do missions for at least a year. I ended the school year not knowing where I was going to go or what I was going to be doing, which was really scary. I've always had long-term plans for my life... even when they didn't turn out the way I expected them to, there was still always a plan. When I was 15, I knew that I was going to go to college, major in psychology, go to graduate school, get my MFT degree, and spend the rest of my life as a Christian counselor.
Those plans changed as I went into my last semester of college because I realized that my career would be spent in an office, listening to people's problems. I still love listening to people's problems, but I think one of the reasons I love it is because I'm not getting paid for it. I enjoy being a good listener, but I think I would have become resentful about helping people with their problems if I had chosen it as a career. I also don't think I could have worked in an office. I worked in the alumni office at Vanguard while I went to school there. It was only 8 hours per week, but it usually felt like 40. I felt claustrophobic the majority of the time, I stuffed envelopes, filed things, copied things, etc. All indoors, never seeing the light of day (now I'm just being dramatic). The gist of it is that I found I needed a job where I'm able to move around a lot and all of them since then have been that way.
I graduated college with the BA in Psychology in hand, started looking for jobs in group homes, found that I would have been eaten alive by the teenagers in group homes, and ended up working with adults with developmental disabilities instead. I fell in love with this population of people and that ended up leading me down the path to becoming a special ed. teacher. With that came a lot of joy (i.e. the students, field trips, the students, pep rallies, watching kids from general ed. becoming friends with the students, the other teachers, supportive parents, and did I mention the students?) and a lot of trials (i.e. endless paperwork, parents who yelled at staff, advocates, cliques within the staff, etc.). There were a lot of people that I met over the past 2 years who became like family to me, but I also knew that it was time for me to leave busy, materialistic Orange County.
After a month or so of not having a long-term plan for the first time in my life, it appears that I'll be moving to Eastern Kentucky. There's a place called the Christian Appalachian Project and I have felt that God is leading me there for this period in my life. I've applied to be a long-term volunteer for 9 months beginning October 1st and I'm really excited to see what's going to happen during my time there. I'll be living with other volunteers in a community house, sharing meals and prayer together 5 days per week. They have a lot of different service opportunities, but I'm hoping that I'll end up as a respite worker for adults with disabilities or that I'll get to work in their program for 3-5 year olds. They could end up placing me somewhere else within CAP, but those were the two that really piqued my interest. There seems to be a plan again (as long as I get in) and I can't wait to see what will happen!
Those plans changed as I went into my last semester of college because I realized that my career would be spent in an office, listening to people's problems. I still love listening to people's problems, but I think one of the reasons I love it is because I'm not getting paid for it. I enjoy being a good listener, but I think I would have become resentful about helping people with their problems if I had chosen it as a career. I also don't think I could have worked in an office. I worked in the alumni office at Vanguard while I went to school there. It was only 8 hours per week, but it usually felt like 40. I felt claustrophobic the majority of the time, I stuffed envelopes, filed things, copied things, etc. All indoors, never seeing the light of day (now I'm just being dramatic). The gist of it is that I found I needed a job where I'm able to move around a lot and all of them since then have been that way.
I graduated college with the BA in Psychology in hand, started looking for jobs in group homes, found that I would have been eaten alive by the teenagers in group homes, and ended up working with adults with developmental disabilities instead. I fell in love with this population of people and that ended up leading me down the path to becoming a special ed. teacher. With that came a lot of joy (i.e. the students, field trips, the students, pep rallies, watching kids from general ed. becoming friends with the students, the other teachers, supportive parents, and did I mention the students?) and a lot of trials (i.e. endless paperwork, parents who yelled at staff, advocates, cliques within the staff, etc.). There were a lot of people that I met over the past 2 years who became like family to me, but I also knew that it was time for me to leave busy, materialistic Orange County.
After a month or so of not having a long-term plan for the first time in my life, it appears that I'll be moving to Eastern Kentucky. There's a place called the Christian Appalachian Project and I have felt that God is leading me there for this period in my life. I've applied to be a long-term volunteer for 9 months beginning October 1st and I'm really excited to see what's going to happen during my time there. I'll be living with other volunteers in a community house, sharing meals and prayer together 5 days per week. They have a lot of different service opportunities, but I'm hoping that I'll end up as a respite worker for adults with disabilities or that I'll get to work in their program for 3-5 year olds. They could end up placing me somewhere else within CAP, but those were the two that really piqued my interest. There seems to be a plan again (as long as I get in) and I can't wait to see what will happen!
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